classic-maya
vanconcastiel:

ninjanaomi:

castiel-on-top-of-the-tree:

rhamphotheca:

Help Our Turtle Friends!!!

NO NO NO NO
WRONG
SO VERY WRONG
LISTEN ALL MY FELLOW FRIENDS: I’VE VOLUNTEERED AT THE NEW ENGLAND WILDLIFE CENTER, A PLACE WHERE PEOPLE FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD TRAVEL TO INTERN AT, FOR MORE THAN YEAR AND THIS IS SO VERY WRONG
IN CASE YA’LL DIDN’T KNOW, TURTLE ARE CONNECTED TO THEIR SHELLS, AND PICKING THEM UP LIKE IS SHOWN IN THE PICTURE CAN SEVERELY DAMAGE THEIR SPINE, ESPECIALLY IF YOU JERK THEM AROUND
SO LET ME TELL YOU A THING
IF YOU SEE A TURTLE IN THE ROAD, STOP YOUR CAR FAR ENOUGH AWAY THAT THE TURTLE CAN STILL BE SEEN THROUGH YOUR WINDSHIELD.
IF YOU’RE ON A NON-BUSY ROAD AND/OR THE TURTLE ISN’T FLIPPED ON IT’S SHELL (WHICH BY THE WAY WHAT THE FUCK TURTLE DON’T ACTUALLY FALL ON THEIR BACKS LIKE THAT PRETTY MUCH EVER ESPECIALLY IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD SO I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN THAT PICTURE) GET A STICK OR JUST USE YOUR FOOT TO GENTLY NUDGE THE TURTLE’S REAR IN THE DIRECTION IT’S GOING IN. THOSE FUCKERS ARE FAST WHEN THEY WANT TO BE.
IF PICKING UP THE TURTLE IS NECESSARY, APPROACH IT FROM THE SIDE, MAKE SURE IT SEES YOU, THEN GO AROUND THE BACK. ALL TURTLES HAVE JAWS LIKE THE VIRGIN ASSHOLE OF SATAN, EVEN IF IT’S NOT A SNAPPER, AND YOU DO NOT WANT THOSE CLAMPERS ON YOUR HAND OR ARM. BELIEVE ME.
PICK THAT SHELLED CUTENESS UP LIKE A HAMBURGER, ONE HAND ON EACH SIDE OF THE SHELL HALFWAY BETWEEN FRONT AND BACK LEGS, FINGERS ON THE BOTTOM SHELL, THUMBS ON THE TOP SHELL. KEEP THE TURTLE AS HORIZONTAL AS YOU CAN AS YOU CARRY IT TO THE SIDE OF THE ROAD.
DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT BRING THE TURTLE TO A “SAFE HABITAT.” DISPLACING ANY SPECIES OF WILDLIFE LOWERS THEIR CHANCE OF SURVIVAL DUE TO NOT KNOWING WHERE THE FUCK THEY ARE. MAKE SURE THE TURTLE IS SOMEWHERE AROUND TEN PACES AWAY FROM ANY KIND OF HUMAN CONTRAPTION, INCLUDING HOUSES AND SIDEWALKS, AND THEN LEAVE HIM TO HIS DEVICES. THEY’RE NOT STUPID, THEY’RE NOT GONNA TURN AROUND AND WALK RIGHT BACK WHERE THEY CAME FROM.
THINGS TO REMEMBER:
-DON’T PICK UP BY THE TAIL. IT CAN BREAK THE SPINE.
-DON’T MOVE TO ANOTHER HABITAT.
-DON’T TAKE ‘EM HOME. THAT’S ACTUALLY ILLEGAL IN MOST STATES.
-DON’T PUT YOUR HANDS ANYWHERE NEAR THE MOUTH.
-BE WARY OF THEIR FEET, THEIR CLAWS CAN BE SHARP.
-WASH YOUR HANDS AFTER, REPTILES CAN CARRY SALMONELLA AND WHILE IT’S PRETTY MUCH IMPOSSIBLE TO CONTRACT IT UNLESS YOU SUCK ON THEIR CLOACA IT’S BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY.
-DON’T MOVE THE TURTLE TO THE SIDE OF THE ROAD THEY JUST CAME FROM. WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU DO THAT. THEY WANT TO GO THE WAY THEY WERE GOING, GENIUS.
-IF THE TURTLE IS ON A HIGHWAY, IT’S PROBABLY BEST TO PICK THEM UP- AS DESCRIBED ABOVE- AND PUT THEM IN A BOX FOR TRANSPORT SINCE THEY’RE SQUIRMY LITTLE BITCHES.
-SNAPPERS ARE JUST AS IMPORTANT AS OTHER TURTLES, DON’T IGNORE THEM BECAUSE THEY LOOK LIKE DEMON CHILD OF A T-REX AND BOX TURTLE. NO MATTER HOW BUSY THE ROAD IS, THOUGH, THE RULE OF THUMB IS DON’T PICK THEM UP IF THEY’RE BIGGER THAN YOUR HEAD. STOP TRAFFIC AND NUDGE THEM ALONG. PEOPLE MAY BE PISSED AT YOU, BUT AT LEAST YOU’LL KEEP YOUR FINGERS.
WIELD YOUR NEW FOUND KNOWLEDGE FREQUENTLY, MY FELLOW TURTLE SAVIORS.

it is important that you read this shining example of wildlife safety literature all the way through to fully appreciate its radiance and learn the ways of turtle protection.

This is super important. But also.
The Virgin asshole of satan

vanconcastiel:

ninjanaomi:

castiel-on-top-of-the-tree:

rhamphotheca:

Help Our Turtle Friends!!!

NO NO NO NO

WRONG

SO VERY WRONG

LISTEN ALL MY FELLOW FRIENDS: I’VE VOLUNTEERED AT THE NEW ENGLAND WILDLIFE CENTER, A PLACE WHERE PEOPLE FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD TRAVEL TO INTERN AT, FOR MORE THAN YEAR AND THIS IS SO VERY WRONG

IN CASE YA’LL DIDN’T KNOW, TURTLE ARE CONNECTED TO THEIR SHELLS, AND PICKING THEM UP LIKE IS SHOWN IN THE PICTURE CAN SEVERELY DAMAGE THEIR SPINE, ESPECIALLY IF YOU JERK THEM AROUND

SO LET ME TELL YOU A THING

IF YOU SEE A TURTLE IN THE ROAD, STOP YOUR CAR FAR ENOUGH AWAY THAT THE TURTLE CAN STILL BE SEEN THROUGH YOUR WINDSHIELD.

IF YOU’RE ON A NON-BUSY ROAD AND/OR THE TURTLE ISN’T FLIPPED ON IT’S SHELL (WHICH BY THE WAY WHAT THE FUCK TURTLE DON’T ACTUALLY FALL ON THEIR BACKS LIKE THAT PRETTY MUCH EVER ESPECIALLY IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD SO I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN THAT PICTURE) GET A STICK OR JUST USE YOUR FOOT TO GENTLY NUDGE THE TURTLE’S REAR IN THE DIRECTION IT’S GOING IN. THOSE FUCKERS ARE FAST WHEN THEY WANT TO BE.

IF PICKING UP THE TURTLE IS NECESSARY, APPROACH IT FROM THE SIDE, MAKE SURE IT SEES YOU, THEN GO AROUND THE BACK. ALL TURTLES HAVE JAWS LIKE THE VIRGIN ASSHOLE OF SATAN, EVEN IF IT’S NOT A SNAPPER, AND YOU DO NOT WANT THOSE CLAMPERS ON YOUR HAND OR ARM. BELIEVE ME.

PICK THAT SHELLED CUTENESS UP LIKE A HAMBURGER, ONE HAND ON EACH SIDE OF THE SHELL HALFWAY BETWEEN FRONT AND BACK LEGS, FINGERS ON THE BOTTOM SHELL, THUMBS ON THE TOP SHELL. KEEP THE TURTLE AS HORIZONTAL AS YOU CAN AS YOU CARRY IT TO THE SIDE OF THE ROAD.

DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT BRING THE TURTLE TO A “SAFE HABITAT.” DISPLACING ANY SPECIES OF WILDLIFE LOWERS THEIR CHANCE OF SURVIVAL DUE TO NOT KNOWING WHERE THE FUCK THEY ARE. MAKE SURE THE TURTLE IS SOMEWHERE AROUND TEN PACES AWAY FROM ANY KIND OF HUMAN CONTRAPTION, INCLUDING HOUSES AND SIDEWALKS, AND THEN LEAVE HIM TO HIS DEVICES. THEY’RE NOT STUPID, THEY’RE NOT GONNA TURN AROUND AND WALK RIGHT BACK WHERE THEY CAME FROM.

THINGS TO REMEMBER:

-DON’T PICK UP BY THE TAIL. IT CAN BREAK THE SPINE.

-DON’T MOVE TO ANOTHER HABITAT.

-DON’T TAKE ‘EM HOME. THAT’S ACTUALLY ILLEGAL IN MOST STATES.

-DON’T PUT YOUR HANDS ANYWHERE NEAR THE MOUTH.

-BE WARY OF THEIR FEET, THEIR CLAWS CAN BE SHARP.

-WASH YOUR HANDS AFTER, REPTILES CAN CARRY SALMONELLA AND WHILE IT’S PRETTY MUCH IMPOSSIBLE TO CONTRACT IT UNLESS YOU SUCK ON THEIR CLOACA IT’S BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY.

-DON’T MOVE THE TURTLE TO THE SIDE OF THE ROAD THEY JUST CAME FROM. WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU DO THAT. THEY WANT TO GO THE WAY THEY WERE GOING, GENIUS.

-IF THE TURTLE IS ON A HIGHWAY, IT’S PROBABLY BEST TO PICK THEM UP- AS DESCRIBED ABOVE- AND PUT THEM IN A BOX FOR TRANSPORT SINCE THEY’RE SQUIRMY LITTLE BITCHES.

-SNAPPERS ARE JUST AS IMPORTANT AS OTHER TURTLES, DON’T IGNORE THEM BECAUSE THEY LOOK LIKE DEMON CHILD OF A T-REX AND BOX TURTLE. NO MATTER HOW BUSY THE ROAD IS, THOUGH, THE RULE OF THUMB IS DON’T PICK THEM UP IF THEY’RE BIGGER THAN YOUR HEAD. STOP TRAFFIC AND NUDGE THEM ALONG. PEOPLE MAY BE PISSED AT YOU, BUT AT LEAST YOU’LL KEEP YOUR FINGERS.

WIELD YOUR NEW FOUND KNOWLEDGE FREQUENTLY, MY FELLOW TURTLE SAVIORS.

it is important that you read this shining example of wildlife safety literature all the way through to fully appreciate its radiance and learn the ways of turtle protection.

This is super important. But also.

The Virgin asshole of satan

classic-maya
wearetylerspeople:

the-uncalm-nipples:

nodaybuttodaytodefygravity:

nateriot:

Obama on gay adoption 


yeah totally ruining this country what a horrible guy

Fun fact: Obama has attempted to fix almost everything that he promised to fix, but the republicans have voted almost all of his bills out of congress. He’s not the problem.

Fun fact: Obama doesn’t make laws, Congress does.

wearetylerspeople:

the-uncalm-nipples:

nodaybuttodaytodefygravity:

nateriot:

Obama on gay adoption 

image

yeah totally ruining this country what a horrible guy

Fun fact: Obama has attempted to fix almost everything that he promised to fix, but the republicans have voted almost all of his bills out of congress. He’s not the problem.

Fun fact: Obama doesn’t make laws, Congress does.

brotherhood-of-feels
devilsgates-and-triquetras:

eat-my-bitchcake:

amostpeculiarwoman:

sherlockedcannibal:

thesituationalstudent:

speechlessenglishmajor:

calculatedmadness:

empresspenguin:

calculatedmadness:

speechlessenglishmajor:

calculatedmadness:

speechlessenglishmajor:

striderbeegood:

ARIEL YOU STUPID IDIOT YOUR BRA DOESNT MATCH YOUR TAIL YOU LOOK LIKE A FREAKING FASHION CATASTROPHE

BUT NEITHER DOES HER SISTER WITH THE YELLOW TAIL AND GREEN BRA

WHY ARE WE SCREAMING ABOUT THE LITTLE MERMAID?  

I DON’T KNOW BUT IT SEEMED NECESSARY?

WHILE WE’RE AT IT, WHY DO THEY ALL HAVE DIFFERENT HAIR COLOR?  I DON’T KNOW IF THIS IS GENETICALLY POSSIBLE WITH JUST TWO PARENTS!  SOMEONE WITH SCIENCE FIGURE THIS OUT!

ARE THEY ACTUALLY SISTERS? BECAUSE, HAIR COLOR ASIDE THE GENETICS BEHIND DIFFERENT TAIL COLORS (BEING SO DISTINCT) WOULD BE EVEN MORE IMPROBABLE

I MEAN, WE NEVER SEE A MOTHER!  THERE COULD BE MULTIPLE WOMEN INVOLVED IN TRITON’S LOVE LIFE!

PERHAPS THEY’RE HALF-SISTERS? OR MAYBE THEY DYED THEIR HAIR? COULD IT BE POSSIBLE THAT THEY DYED THEIR TAILS AS WELL?

I’M PRETTY SURE ALL OF THOSE HAIR COLORS COULD COME FROM TWO PARENTS. LIKE, IF TRITON HAS BRUNETTE AND REDHEAD ALLELES AND THE MOM HAS BLONDE AND REDHEAD ALLELES THIS IS TOTALLY POSSIBLE. AND IF WE ASSUME THAT TAIL COLOR IS CONTROLLED SEPARATELY FROM HAIR COLOR I FAIL TO SEE AN ISSUE. MERMAIDS COULD HAVE.. THEY COULD EVEN BE CODOMINANT. SO THEY’RE ALL EITHER RED DOMINANT OR BLUE DOMINANT. DIFFERENT COMBINATIONS OF EITHER RED OR BLUE ALLELES COULD ACCOUNT FOR ALL OF THEM. THERE.

Only on tumblr will you see a discussion about the science behind physical traits of characters in a Disney movie

YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE SCREAMING GET WITH THE PROGRAM

iTS BACK

I ALMOST SCROLLED PAST THIS…ALMOST.

devilsgates-and-triquetras:

eat-my-bitchcake:

amostpeculiarwoman:

sherlockedcannibal:

thesituationalstudent:

speechlessenglishmajor:

calculatedmadness:

empresspenguin:

calculatedmadness:

speechlessenglishmajor:

calculatedmadness:

speechlessenglishmajor:

striderbeegood:

ARIEL YOU STUPID IDIOT YOUR BRA DOESNT MATCH YOUR TAIL YOU LOOK LIKE A FREAKING FASHION CATASTROPHE

BUT NEITHER DOES HER SISTER WITH THE YELLOW TAIL AND GREEN BRA

WHY ARE WE SCREAMING ABOUT THE LITTLE MERMAID?  

I DON’T KNOW BUT IT SEEMED NECESSARY?

WHILE WE’RE AT IT, WHY DO THEY ALL HAVE DIFFERENT HAIR COLOR?  I DON’T KNOW IF THIS IS GENETICALLY POSSIBLE WITH JUST TWO PARENTS!  SOMEONE WITH SCIENCE FIGURE THIS OUT!

ARE THEY ACTUALLY SISTERS? BECAUSE, HAIR COLOR ASIDE THE GENETICS BEHIND DIFFERENT TAIL COLORS (BEING SO DISTINCT) WOULD BE EVEN MORE IMPROBABLE

I MEAN, WE NEVER SEE A MOTHER!  THERE COULD BE MULTIPLE WOMEN INVOLVED IN TRITON’S LOVE LIFE!

PERHAPS THEY’RE HALF-SISTERS? OR MAYBE THEY DYED THEIR HAIR? COULD IT BE POSSIBLE THAT THEY DYED THEIR TAILS AS WELL?

I’M PRETTY SURE ALL OF THOSE HAIR COLORS COULD COME FROM TWO PARENTS. LIKE, IF TRITON HAS BRUNETTE AND REDHEAD ALLELES AND THE MOM HAS BLONDE AND REDHEAD ALLELES THIS IS TOTALLY POSSIBLE. AND IF WE ASSUME THAT TAIL COLOR IS CONTROLLED SEPARATELY FROM HAIR COLOR I FAIL TO SEE AN ISSUE. MERMAIDS COULD HAVE.. THEY COULD EVEN BE CODOMINANT. SO THEY’RE ALL EITHER RED DOMINANT OR BLUE DOMINANT. DIFFERENT COMBINATIONS OF EITHER RED OR BLUE ALLELES COULD ACCOUNT FOR ALL OF THEM. THERE.

Only on tumblr will you see a discussion about the science behind physical traits of characters in a Disney movie

YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE SCREAMING GET WITH THE PROGRAM

iTS BACK

I ALMOST SCROLLED PAST THIS…ALMOST.

classic-maya

disneyvillainsforjustice:

sweetmadameblue:

theouijagirl:

kerplunkers:

hypo-thermic:

yogaboi:

toocooltobehipster:

To donate £5 to the charity supporting the male victims of domestic abuse, text the message: MKDV46 to 70070
Click here to watch the video

At first I though this was a joke

Don’t ignore this Tumblr

Yet they still do even when it’s right in their face.

This reminds me of how a friend of mine was abused by the mother of his child. She was mentally unstable and used to berate him constantly and would smack him in the head all the time. It really pissed me off. Then one night she threw hot coffee in his face and tried to stab him with a screwdriver. The cops hauled him off to jail because she made up a sob story that painted herself as the victim. 

Once he left her, he stayed with me and it was a nightmare. She stalked him and me. She would drive by my house obsessively at all hours of the day and night (her muffler made a weird sound so I know it was her). She started showing up at my job, showing up at the places I frequented around town, and filling up my voicemail with dead air. The cops were no help.

One day she got bold enough to talk her way into my home by conning my elderly grandmother, whom I was taking care of, while I was out. She went in my room and went through my stuff (creepy), then found him napping on the couch and attacked him. My grandmother witnessed the whole thing. He grabbed her by the arms, forced her out the front door, and locked it. The cops were called again. They said they’d go and ‘talk’ to her.

The next day we were watching a movie and there was a knock at the door. The police had come to arrest him. She filed a complaint against him and shown off some bruises on her arms from the altercation that she swore were completely unprovoked. My grandmother saw the whole thing since she was in the living room too and testified on his behalf. He still ended up serving jail time.
No one takes male domestic violence victims seriously. They only see males as perpetrators.

    

Please, if you witness abuse, no matter WHO the recipient is, report it. If someone you know if being abused (not just physically - in any way) help them. Connect them to resources. Gender doesn’t matter in this case - no one deserves to be abused. 

National Domestic Abuse Hotline

- Mod Dawes Sr.